dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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