just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
