He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
