Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
