Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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