they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
