so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
