she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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