I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
