"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
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