I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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