Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
