jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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