Grow some girl-balls and come out already
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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