what day is it and did you see me today?
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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