remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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