Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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