nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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