we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
