It's like a parade of train wrecks.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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