very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
