he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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