I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
