everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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