i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
