shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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