you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Are we still banned from the library?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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