Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize