I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
