forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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