"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
