Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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