OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
