Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
