Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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