At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
