so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
