If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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