im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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