fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
