I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
