Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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