i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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