how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
