tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Randomize
