i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
