What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
