OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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