shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
