my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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